Would you accept a gift from your ex?

Fate brought Misan and Ula (not real names) together during their university days and they became friends. They decided to take their relationship a notch higher after they had graduated. This was after a courtship that lasted for 6 years. Plans for their wedding were on and they, together with family, friends and old schoolmates, eagerly looked forward to their big day.

On the eve/bachelorette night of the wedding, Ula’s former boyfriend Idun came to the poolside where Ula and her girlfriends were having their party. Sighting him from afar, she accosted him and when he stated the purpose of his visit, she was confused and to make the situation worse, he brought a gift for her which he called a ‘little package’. She stood there dumbfounded as her voice suddenly disappeared; she was in a dilemma. Should she accept the gift or not?

The scenario painted above takes place more often than not. Irrespective of the cause of the break-up, would it be a danger or peace sign when an ex suddenly appears with a gift on one’s birthday or wedding?   What would you do if you were the one?

Lifextra spoke to people and got very interesting responses.  I.K Sule, single and a civil servant, said he would be wary because he wouldn’t want anything that will make it ‘green’ again. Explaining what he meant by ‘green’, he said “Our previous relationship.”

Abdurrazak Salihu Maiwada, a student, said it depended on the circumstances surrounding their breakup. “It all depends on how I broke up with her. I’ll gladly accept it if the break up was ‘matured’. On the contrary, I’ll not even give her the opportunity to confront me with the gift.”

When Lifextra probed further on why it depended on the nature of the breakup, he stated that it’s because it’ll determine the scar that’ll be left in his heart. “If the break up was rough and disrespectful, why the gifts when I know that there is love in giving? Her gestures will rather end up putting me in the dark.”

Adebiyi Olubunmi Barry, an engineer and married, said he won’t collect it neither would he give because “It might affect the present relationship due to the fact that the spouse of any of the ‘receiving party’ might feel jealous about it.

Abiodun O. Raphael, from Ikare-Akoko, Ondo State, told Lifextra that he would collect the gift. With an emphatic yes, he said “I can and it’s nothing because there are no strings attached.  So it’s no big deal to collect a gift from one’s ex. Once upon a time, we were best friends.”