Why won’t they settle down?

Dear Nabilah,

I have 3 adult younger Brothers past the age of 30 who are all still living at home with our parents.

They are all graduates but refused to get employment or move out of the family house, they also refused to further their studies.

All their friends and mates are married with children while they are still dependent on the family for everything; they are completely and utterly irresponsible.

It’s just perplexing to me what is making them behave like this?

Is It some kind of psychological disease or mental illness?

How do I make them become responsible and settle down?

-Worried Elder Sis.

Dear Elder Sis,

Only a qualified psychotherapist can examine and tell you exactly what is causing your brothers to behave in such ways.

But it’s a common knowledge that most of our adult psychological and emotional faults are rooted in our childhood especially when children experience trauma, abuse, neglect or separation from either of the 2 parents.

And these childhood experiences affect children differently, the same experience that motivates others to work hard and lead a better life, can become a deterrent to success for others.

These children that couldn’t push themselves out from the negative experience of childhood tend to be waiting for some kind of closure to that experience in order to move on, only a strong wake up experience or psychotherapy can push them to make the decision to move on with their life.

Also some overly pampered children tend to develop extreme laziness in adulthood.

Sadly there’s nothing you can do to make your Brother’s become responsible, they have to do it internally by themselves, they have to find their own way, to have that strong reason to convince their own selves that it’s time to change, it’s time to move on.

You can continue to pray for them, stop judging them (if you are), increase in your tolerance for their habits, and minimize financial assistance to basic necessities only; It will good if you can find a psychotherapist and convince them to start a session, it will do a lot of good which hopefully can help them to unravel what is causing their tardiness to settle down.

Is there a correlation between mental illness and demonic possession?

Dear Nabilah,

I have a childhood friend, she was my best friend in primary and secondary school.

Later we all got married and drifted apart.

We recently caught up with each other and renewed our friendship.

She used to have jinn’s possession while we were at boarding school to the extent she would lose consciousness or have seizures.

Through our catching up chat she told me that she’s still suffering from jinn possession but she’s managing it with mental illness drugs that were prescribed to her at the mental illness hospital.

Whenever she feels like she’s about to have the attack she takes the drugs and it will prevent the attack by inducing her into a very deep sleep.

It’s so confusing to me that drugs can treat jinns?

I thought jinns are beings with a will of their own so how can you treat their invasion with drugs?

I thought they are capable of overriding the will power of their victim so how can a simple chemical drug nullify their abilities?

-Perplexed Friend

Dear Friend,

Mental illness, spiritual illness and demonic or jinn possession are completely different illnesses but they use the same mechanism that’s through the brain neural pathways, and manifest in the same way that is by altering emotions, behavior and perception of the affected person.

Their treatment also differ, mental illness is mostly treated with a combination of psychotherapy lifestyle changes and appropriate drugs, spiritual illness  is treated with psychotherapy, lifestyle changes; and meditation while demonic possession is treated with exorcism, lifestyle changes, meditation and appropriate medicines.

The drug you mentioned is probably a sedative that induces deep sleep to prevent the individual from experiencing symptoms of that particular illness, so it’s applicable to all 3 types of illnesses, because it’s not necessarily treating the illness rather inducing a deep sleep to enable the frayed nerves to calm down and the mental system to relaxes back to normal.

It’s the agitation to the emotional or mental state of the individual that mostly triggers such attacks, and a deep sleep relaxes the whole body and mind as such when the patient wakes up the trigger is gone and so also the ignited symptoms of such illnesses.

How do I become a better English Speaker?

Dear Nabilah,

I would like to be speaking fluent English and any attempt to it, prove abortive; please guide me on ways to become a better English speaker?

-Mr. English

Dear Mr. English,

Stop attempting and start doing; practice English speaking every time and everywhere; make it such a big force in your life; insert a strong passionate conviction in your heart that you are indeed a fluent English speaker;  befriend and surrounds yourself with people that speak good English and listen to how they pronounce their words; download different types of English conversations from the net and listen attentively, copy and imitate until you master the correct pronunciation; watch movies and documentaries but concentrating on the way the words are flowing out rather then how the movie unfold; download English speaking applications on your mobile phones, learn and practice accordingly; record yourself speaking English and keep checking for and correcting your mistake; above all, don’t give up on yourself, practice religiously and you will soon be amaze by your fluent English speaking!