Recently, at a wedding between a Yoruba lady and Hausa man, Rukkayyah and Fahad held in Kaduna, those who spoke with the Home Front expressed their views on why intermarriage should be encouraged and practiced in our society.
Alhaja Sulaiyah Ahmed who married about 57 years ago said there is nothing bad in someone from the Igbo ethnic group marrying a Yoruba or Hausa person.
She opined that, once they worship the same God and understand themselves, there wouldn’t be any problem.
“My mother is a Hausa woman and she married aYoruba man. I was born and bred in the North, all my siblings are Hausas and I married a Yoruba man. I find it so interesting because that makes me know many things from Yoruba side and as a result of that, I relate well with everyone and I am living harmoniously with them,” she said.
She advised the new couple to be patient and hold on to their religion and God saying if they believe in their God and the husband and wife respect each other they will have peace in their matrimonial home.
Engineer Mohammed Sambo, the bride’s father thanked Almighty God for granting him the ability to see one of his daughters to her matrimonial home.
“I feel happy and relieved because for a father who is blessed with female child or children, the ultimate is to give her out in marriage so as to fulfill one of God’s commandments to go and multiply on her own.
“When my daughter brought home the person she wanted to marry, I examined his characters in-terms of morals and religion. Fortunately, he possessed the qualities and that makes him worthy to me, and through that, it was also established that a well mannered child must have come from good parents,” he said.
He said he sees inter-marriage as a blessing, “religion wise we all belong to the same family and once you base everything on religion, it does not matter which ever race, culture, tribe or whatever, provided he is religious then you know your daughter or son is in the safe hands.”
The bride’s father said marriage is like a project and something that every human being must pass through in life. He advised the couple to make patience their watchword adding that being a couple means they should have a common goal and direction and respect each other so as to achieve their goals.
He also advised parents to allow their wards to decide for themselves who to marry, and should support them by putting on their best in making it modest then leave the rest to God.
The bride’s mother, Alhaja Rabiat Sambo said, “We have put everything in the hands of God. As parents we cannot decide for her since she is the one that will stay with her husband and his family. So, I pray for God’s guidance for the couple, bless them with good children, and live long in happiness.”
The groom’s father, Alhaji Ahmed Chikaji said marriage is not by tribe; so far we are all human beings. “Islamic religion allows Muslims to marry Christian women without any hindrance.”
He enjoined the couple to stay in peace, “whenever they have misunderstanding, they should resolve it themselves without interference of a third party or even their parents,”he said.
Mrs. Chikaji on her part said the couple chose themselves and since they decided to marry each other, they have no objection. “We agreed for them to marry because we are all one be it Igbo or Yoruba. I pray there will not be problem as I will be guiding them towards the right path to attain better relationship,” she said.
Fahad Ahmed, the groom said “I feel great as I finally married the person I love. She is the kind of lady I wish to have as my partner so her tribe does not matter to me. My advice to youths over there is that they should ensure anybody they intend to marry is religious and from a good family.”
The bride, Rukkayyah Mohammed Sambo, also expressed her feeling saying, “I thank God for giving me the opportunity to marry the person I love and adore. I married him based on his personality- his kindness, honesty, and simply attracted me. No matter how challenging marital affairs may be, I am prepared to face it -with him by side.”
She advised ladies that are yet to marry to be patient, and prayerful. They should look for a man with potentials as well as search for a man who will build a future with them. As I always say ‘I am not moved with big names, but men of integrity move me’.
Osage Ozazua, an Edo man married to a Yoruba lady from Ilorin said intermarriage is a perfect and good type of marriage we need in Nigeria saying that, criticizing it is abnormal because no one knows the best as they might be meant for each other from God, and it will help to develop the country and ensure love, peace and unity among citizens.
He said his marriage with his wife is working fine because they have the same religion and also understand each other. He said despite the fact that he travels a lot, his wife never complains because he always makes her happy by living up to his duties as the head of the family. “The new couple should hold on to the God they are serving in-that, He is not a disappointing God. The most important thing in marriage is tolerance. Normally, lots of problems do occur along the line but when both of you understand yourselves, pray a lot, and endure, the relationship will be smooth and successful, “ he advised.
Mr. Ozazua urged parents to allow their children to marry from any tribe they wish, “ because what God has joined together let no man put asunder. Let one tribe marry the other and from there we are making ways for ourselves. Prophet Mohammed (S.A.W) said ‘Adua hul- Zaifil Mumineen’ meaning – prayer is the key to life hence, the parents need to pray for God guidance and everything shall be well with them,” he explained.
A public analyst, Mr. Aminullahi Danzaki who agrees with the idea of inter-marriage said unionism between two different entities is a product of civilization because the world today has become global a village through the existence of information communication technology which has brought human beings of different communities, tribes, societies and cultures too close and mixing together.
“Love is one kind of variable in life- when it comes, you forget about where you come from be it religion or tribe in-that, you are already involved due to circumstance. Inter- marriage is beautiful, ideal and entrench unity so, it is not something we should criticize after all we are all human beings as God created man in his own image thus, it is about man to man not man to animal,” he explained.
He said we are Nigerians and nothing should disunite us saying, “in Ghana, Europe and other countries for instance, you see Nigerians marrying Ghanians, Europeans and others and they leave peacefully. Presumably, any nation which rejects other parts, there will be no progress there,” he said.
He implored singles to discuss and address the issue of religion well before getting married.
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