The best atmosphere a couple could create around their home is a thriving love that is all embracing. A love that spreads its shade beyond the frontiers of the nucleus of their family but gives warmth and satisfaction to anyone that has anything to do with them. This way, its tree shall bear fruits from which their progeny and other generations shall gain.
True sometimes, circumstances get so tense that turns a woman’s matrimonial home into one of misery, suffocating all her efforts towards grooming her household in harmony and stability. Sometimes she does not understand why certain things happen and sometimes she is the architect of her own misfortune; overtly or covertly. Yet, whatever the case, this is the time to recall all the sermon good friends, parents and relatives drummed into her ears at the time of marriage.
The moment a woman decides to get married, that is the time she is expected to prepare her mind that she is starting an adventure into the unknown. Apart from the fixtures she folds together to her new home, one necessity she will need throughout her stay in the house is a set of shock absorbers. Therefore, should the hurdles start emerging, she should recall that they were expected anyway and those absorbers will come in handy. A prepared mind has a vision, one must not lose it, no matter the temptation, if your vision is to grow love – hold on to it, it is the endurance that will make it stronger.
Indeed, sometimes, the stones someone throws at you are actually the bricks you need to build a solid foundation for your home. Sometimes the bricks come from directions you never expected – do not be thrown off balance and keep your cool; regard this as just a bend in your journey and not an end. Realize that you stand as a model to your offspring, your courage, composure and calmness will remain an experience they will decode in their future lives and hopefully your rough road towards raising a sane and stable home shall culminate with triumph.
To make love at home, know that friendship is the soil in which you sow the seed of love. Be friendly to your foes as well. In fact, do not regard anyone as a foe; because you fight a foe but forgive a friend. And your style is not to fight thus, do not have foes. Sometimes; one finds that she is being deliberately dragged into a cold war with those who are supposed to be part of the building blocks in her home. Yes, it could be difficult remaining calm while being slighted. But realize that once you do not toe the line of fire for fire, perhaps you will be blessed with the wisdom to reflect, resist and retreat from retaliating. Thus you will be saved from the pains that vindictiveness jabs in the heart. There is less to achieve from malice or confrontation which patience and sacrifice cannot achieve more. The two afore mentioned reduce you to the level of your offender and the later two elevate.
You are a pillar in your home; a pillar is expected to be strong. Respect yourself and always carry a positive mind. Love, understand and accommodate everyone that is inevitably in your life. Always dwell on their good side for this brings hope. As someone wrote “All things in life are temporary, if going well enjoy – they will not last forever, if going wrong, don’t worry, they can’t last long either”. Remain positive because our thoughts could decide the path we tow.
No matter the pain, minimize your complaints. Seek advice and consolation from neutral persons you trust. Sometimes, even when one has a valid case to cry, the constant complaints, bitterness or jibes that we unleash over it erode other’s willingness to give us strength. Sometimes, some wives, especially possessive ones, complain to their husbands incessantly over people he probably is close to. Such a wife does this without reflecting upon the gap she might be creating between her husband and his close ones. The tongue could be sharper than a knife and often when such men hear too much, they become distanced from people he is supposed to be forever tied to. Of course, she then becomes assuaged. Sometimes, such a woman does this for no other reason but because she wants to feel relevant. She wants to feel most important in his life without thinking of what this might cost him and his estranged ones. Does a person’s relevance lay in the positive things the person achieves or in a vain glory of feeling most important? Let us grow love in our homes and stop the spread of hate. Spare your loved ones the anxiety of grief and instead plant love and satisfaction. Carry the burden of sowing love through thick or thin not out of fear but with the conviction that you are doing what is best for your innocent family – by extension yourself.
Therefore, remember to be constantly armed with this potent potion – always wear a smile: it pleases those who adore you, disarms those skeptics and frustrates those who loath your face. Top this with prayer, you are ready to make everlasting love.
