Signed, sealed, delivered

“Is that Halisa in the doorway?” I asked my friend Amina, the moment I sat at her sitting room.

“Yes she is” Amina answered, “didn’t she greet you when you were coming in?”

“No, you know I came in through your kitchen door because I parked my car really close to it. And she is standing at the front door, it seems like she is expecting someone. Or did she just arrive from her house?”

I asked.

“No, Halisa has been with us for a while. She is also pregnant, maybe that’s why she likes standing at the doorway doing nothing. I mean some pregnant women display all kinds of odd behaviours before their babies are due.” Amina replied, somehow unhappily.

“Oh so she is pregnant? Ma shaa Allah, barakAllah congrats Amina. This means you are going to join the Granny’s Club soon, doesn’t it? Alhamdulillah. May Almighty Allah grant her an easy delivery.” I prayed.

“Amin ya Rabb.” Amina answered.

“I like the way you stick to the old ways. I mean you got her to return home so she can have her baby here and learn how to cope, just like our parents used to insist in the good old days.” I observed, smiling.

“That’s not the reason Bint. Halisa isn’t here because of her baby. The baby isn’t due till another four months from now. She came back home because we have given up on the marriage.” Amina explained.

“What? How can you give up on a marriage that’s less than a year old? What went wrong or wasn’t it a love match?” I asked.

“Yes it was a love match. That’s probably the reason for their problem. If she wasn’t so in love, she would have allowed us to dig deep and find out more about him during their courtship. But all she wanted was to get married to him and all we wanted was to make her happy. So we got her, signed, sealed and delivered to a drug addict. Six months later, she couldn’t hide the truth from us anymore. He had no job, his parents sent them food every month-end plus pocket money. Every morning he would wake up after 10am, take a bath, dress and drive out. He would return in the evening, eat his dinner and take another shower. Then he would go out again, probably to some drug joint and return home quite late and high on drugs. This started from the very week they married but she kept it to herself. Now she couldn’t hide it anymore because whenever she protested his lifestyle he would grow abusive and attempt to beat her up. She always ran away and lock her room to avoid being beaten. Finally, she couldn’t cope with all that running and hiding so she decided to come home. We heard her out and said she made the right decision. Now she’s been with us for two months. Whenever she got tired of sitting around doing nothing she would go and stand at the doorway looking out. I wonder what she’s looking for.” Amina concluded.

‘But did you attempt to talk to him or his parents about mending his wild ways? I mean you can’t just welcome Halisa home and forget she was married.” I insisted.

“Yes Bint, we did talk to his parents and we tried to talk to him too. It became obvious to us that his parents knew about his drug addiction but hid it from us. They probably thought marriage could change him, so they got him married and hoped for the best. He himself made sure he was on his best behaviour throughout their few months of courtship. So Halisa had no inkling what she was going in for. 

But to him marriage was just a stop over before he picked up and continued his bad habits. If only she had given us time to investigate him thoroughly we might have find out about his wild ways. No, she simply pressured us to marry her off because she had found someone suitable. Now look at the result.” Amina lamented.

“No I don’t think it’s fair to blame Halisa for everything. Her only fault was falling in love but you were in a position to insist on knowing everything about him before you contracted the marriage. It was your duty to find out what he did for a living, who his friends were and what his habits were. I know parents generally emphasise the need to find out about his parents, their status in society, any hereditary illness and similar traditional things. 

But times have changed. We have to find out all we can about the man we wish to entrust with our daughter. In the same way if it’s a boy we have to find out all we can about the girl he has decided to make his wife, and eventually the mother of his children. That way we can prevent what has happened to Halisa.” I advised.

“You are right Bint. Right now the parents have enrolled him in a rehab centre for drug addicts. They are begging us to give the marriage another chance as soon as he returns. They insist that a child needs both parents so we should consider that unborn child and allow Halisa to return to her husband. But he won’t be out of rehab till next year. The programme is nine months long. We hope he will be cured of his addiction by then otherwise we will have no choice but to end this marriage.” Amina declared.

“Then let’s sincerely hope that he gets cured and becomes responsible enough to be a husband and a father by next year.” I prayed.