Hala and Ahike have been friends for as long as they could remember. Hala comes from a wealthy home while Ahike’s family could barely afford three square meals while they were growing up, so Ahike and his siblings had to fend for themselves to pass through school. Their mother was a petty trader and their father a security man in the company behind their house. Taking their friendship to the next level, Ahike told Hala how he loved her and wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. She couldn’t hide her excitement because she was head over heels in love with him. After taking him home to meet her parents, they refused to give their consent because they felt he wasn’t her type, despite being a graduate, and their social status was worlds apart. Hala became confused. She didn’t know what to do.
The story above is one of the many scenes shown in our home videos as well as a constant drama in so many homes. Because of the so-called social status (or standing) of many parents in the society, they hinder their children from being with the ones they truly love under the guise of ‘he’s not your type’, ‘she’s a gold digger’, ‘he wants to reap from where he did not sow’ and so on.
Back to the story above; if you were in Hala’s shoes, what would you have done?
Shulaxy Excel, a fashion designer, sees no reason why a person’s social status should be a barrier to true love. She said “I see no reason why it should be because you do not know what tomorrow holds. You do not know what plan God has for that person because someone you see down today may be up tomorrow.”
“If I were in her shoes, I won’t let my parents prevent me from getting married to him because they do not know what he will become tomorrow,” she concluded.
Concurring with Excel, Ikechukwu Charles, a hospitality consultant, reasons that it is only people who are greedy that allow their social status to come between them and true love. He said “one of the major reasons why people let their social status come in between them and true love is because they are materialistic.”
“Even if I’m from a comfortable family and the lady I want to marry is from a low background, I wouldn’t let her background stop me from getting married to her because what we share goes beyond my social status. The major reason for loving her would be trust, compatibility, patience, and so on. So anyone who considers the social status of another person before getting married to that person isn’t really ready yet. The way you see someone today may not be the same way the person would remain tomorrow,” he concluded.
Speaking to Lifextra, Emem Bassey, said what most parents need is a little understanding. There should be explanations and clarifications concerning the person. “If I were in her shoes, I’d respectfully reason with my parents and let them know why they shouldn’t attach so much importance to his social status, as long as he is responsible and has potentials.”
In an article titled “class differences”, Tori DeAngelis writes “Social status isn’t just about the cars we drive, the money we make or the schools we attend – it’s also about how we feel, think and act.”
“Social class differences come about because of the ideas and values you are surrounded by, the types of social interactions you have at home, school and work, and the sorts of institutional practices and policies that are common in your community,” she says. “That means that these differences are not immutable,” he concludes.
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