Protecting your children

The society today is one where children should be given the very best of protection from both parents and relatives. A lady who doesn’t want her name published narrates her challenge when it comes to protecting her daughters. 

“The situation in the country isn’t an encouraging one. My petty business isn’t doing too well as we (family) have virtually lived off everything in the shop. My biggest challenge now is the safety of my daughters. My husband borrows money from his friends and most times he sends one of our daughters to go collect the money for him. Recently, my 11-year-old daughter suddenly said she doesn’t want to be sent on such errands again. I tried to get her to tell me why, but she just says she doesn’t like what uncle says sometimes. I told my husband but he doesn’t care and says they are lying. What do I do? As his argument is that afterall, the money they are going to collect is for the benefit of the family.”

Amina Al-amin, 42-year-old chemist, says, “As mothers, we can’t stop our children from respecting the orders of their father but when it comes to situations like this, then you need to take charge as the safety of your daughters is involved. We have seen, heard and read stories where uncles, neighbours and even fathers take advantage of their daughters. Sit with him and tell him the risk involved in sending daughters to his friends, especially when they are starting to feel reluctant going there. In these days of online transfer, he and his friends should be able to use that platform and stop endangering the lives of the innocent girls. Take a stand now as whatever happens to them would come back to haunt you.”

Hassana Ahmed, 40-year-old accountant, however disagrees with Amina to an extent. “Once the girls have started complaining then there is a red flag. Respect or not, I will advice you tell your daughters not to go on such errands again. Let a misunderstanding come up and I will then let his family members know he is putting our daughters at risk. This should not be tolerated, no, not in the present society we live in.”

Victoria Samuel, 38-year-old lawyer, says, “It’s very dangerous to send your daughter to a man’s place in your absence for whatever reason. She could be raped or molested! Tell your hubby to never send his daughter to his friends no matter what. Such errands need to stop now. His daughter’s safety should be of paramount importance to him not money. You need to stand up for her as a mother, if not she won’t forgive you if anything eventually happens. What a cruel world we are in, that the man keeps good friends doesn’t mean she can’t be molested. A word they say is enough for the wise.”

Ibrahim Ahmed, 40-year-old civil servant, says, “Wisdom needs to be applied in this situation as it’s quite a delicate one. Telling your daughter to stop going on errand for her father will escalate issues as he may conclude that you are teaching her to disrespect him. On the other hand, allowing her to run such errand will be putting her at risk. The best thing is to sit your husband down and discuss the issue and let him see reasons with you.”