Living through post-partum depression

Childbirth is an experience everyone woman wishes to go through. However, some new mothers tend to suffer from post-partum depression. The condition is barely talked about and those suffering from it tend to either deal with it on their own or seek professional help. Daily Trust on Sunday reports.

For many women, nothing can be compared to the joy of motherhood and childbirth. Childbirth bears a very significant milestone for almost every woman because right from childhood, women are trained to understand the importance of being a mother, how to take care of the child and still manage the homefront and career.

However, when a woman gives birth in most families, the attention is shifted to the new addition to the family. Although the mothers’ physical wellbeing is catered for, her mental and emotional health is barely talked about.

Research has shown that giving birth causes a long chain of transitional development for a woman, the child and also her family. The World Health Organization (WHO) records that about 20 percent of mothers in developing parts of the world suffer from postpartum depression after childbirth. Studies also show that postpartum depression usually takes place two weeks to a month of the nursing mother returning home and begins to get along with her usual routine such as going back to work, catering to household responsibilities etc.

Many women fall into postpartum depression due to different reasons. Mrs Susan Ike said although she felt a glimpse of joy after her son was born, she became so concerned about other aspects of her life that she slipped into depression.

“After we got back from the hospital, it was as if reality had just hit me. I realised that my responsibilities had just increased. It was clear that I would now have to be responsible and train another human being.”

Mrs Ike, who is a banker, added that she was torn between her job and having to raise her child. She said that “For the first few weeks after I resumed at the office, it felt like all I did was multitask between work and the child, having to always call to check on the child and also make sure I was delivering my best efforts at work became very tiring.”

“Truth be told, I came home one day and carried my baby in my arms with tears in my eyes. I began speaking to myself and saying how I wasn’t sure if I really wanted him around, how I didn’t bargain for the amount of change he had brought into my life, how I wasn’t sure if I would be able to make the sacrifices mothers were to make for their children,” she added.

According to Mrs Ike, she said it was after that night she knew she was going through postpartum depression. “I called my husband, mother and mother-in-law to explain how the past few months had been for me and how adapting to my new responsibilities had been difficult.”

Mrs Ike was advised to see a doctor for some period which proved very helpful. She said during her medical sessions, she was advised to spend more time with family to allow her remember that she didn’t have to go through the process alone. “My doctor made me understand that it wasn’t wrong to feel as if my world had become crowded, he also made me to see that my baby was my bundle of joy, it was from him I would draw strength and courage when I was down,” she said.

For Mrs Iman Usman, her postpartum depression was caused by insecurities and also dealing with body dysmorphia. She explained that “Before getting pregnant, my dress size fluctuated between 12 and sometimes 10. After childbirth, my cloth size became 16. I also had a lot of skin issues when I was pregnant which left me with scars I didn’t like. Never had I ever felt so disappointed in myself.

“So many times, I had looked at myself and couldn’t stand what I had become. I felt I had lost my true essence and beauty. I had to start buying new clothes to go out in and I found the whole exercise to be draining mentally and physically.

“I also noted that my family’s attention had completely moved from me to the child. It was as if my relevance had reduced after I dropped the baby. Even when visitors drop by, their main focus was the baby and not the mother who is still in recovery. It made me wonder if something had happened to me at the moment, would anyone really bother about me or will they see the child as compensation for my passing?” 

Iman explains that before pregnancy, she had always feared being referred to as big or fat, so having to find herself in that position was mentally and emotionally stressful for her. She said; “I started to wonder if I wanted other children and if I’d have to go through the same process with my body all over again. I refused to go out for events because I didn’t feel good in my body, when my baby was brought to me to be fed, I would look at her with a slight thought of anger as if she was the reason why my insecurities had been exposed.”

She stated that the minute she became fully aware of her mood swings and attitudes towards the family and child, she began to do some reading on the aftermath of pregnancy and childbirth and there she learnt about postpartum depression. “Finding out that I wasn’t the only one who was going through this phase gave me some sense of relief, I began reading on how best to work on the issue, the importance of speaking about lifestyle changes during postnatal care, etc.” 

However, Mrs Iman stated that it took a lot of inner work and support from people around her to build herself up. She said that “I opened up to the person handling my post natal care and she gave me tips on how to feel better, my family members also learnt how to be sensitive towards me and they gave me the support I needed to get back on my feet and take care of my child.”

Consultant Gynaecologist at the University of Abuja Teaching Hospital, Dr Nathaniel Adewole, stated that there is so much pressure for women to be the best mothers when their child arrives. However, no one bothers to check on the woman’s mental status and how she’s able to transition from being a wife to being a mother.

“Childbirth changes people, it causes a stir up in the parents’ routine; meaning that adjustments have to be made so they can properly cater to the child’s needs. most especially with mothers. It is only right that they are often questioned either by their family or doctor about how they’re dealing with these little adjustments and what kind of support they need to make the process easier for them,” he said.

He also mentioned that “Many women should note that postnatal care is as important as antenatal care. Many women who are discharged do not register for postnatal care services, rather they come for check-up. During the postnatal care, issues of post-partum depression and how to manage it will be discussed and if any mother is going through it, she will be given the professional advice that she needs.”