Knowing where to draw the line on social media

This era of social media has many of us receiving and sending requests to people we have never met in real life. But how right or wrong is it to send a friend request to the husband of a female Facebook friend you have never met in real life? 

This is an interesting post from a friend’s Facebook wall and it got many of us chipping in our opinions. “It’s inappropriate to send friend requests to husbands of female Facebook friends you were or are not friends with in real life.”

Fatima Musa, 43-year-old pharmacist, asks “Why should a friend who I hardly know send a friend request via any social media platform to my man? In my opinion, it’s a very inappropriate and suspicious move. Even if you are friends in real life, people should just know where to draw the line. It’s very disrespectful to the friend in question and her relationship. Such people have no regards for people’s relationships.”

Hassana Hamza, 40-year-old banker, says “My question is when she sends the request to my husband and he accepts, what next would she be doing? Simple, the next thing is to form a lie against me to him or start asking him for money. It’s a different thing when we (I and my husband) know the said female friend in real life. This doesn’t even guarantee a suspicion-free relationship, so why should someone I hardly know send my husband a friend request. No right thinking woman would do such except she has ulterior motives.” 

Rabiat Ahmed, 41-year-old civil servant, seems to see things from a different angle as she says things aren’t always what they seem to be. “I don’t see anything wrong with that especially if the man’s timeline is an interesting one. Not everyone has bad intentions. She might just like what the man discusses on his timeline. It doesn’t necessarily mean something must be fishy about the person. So many of my female friends that I’m not that close to outside Facebook are friends with my hubby, I see nothing wrong with it. What I think is bad is chatting hubby up at odd hours, and seeking for unnecessary friendship with him.” 

Opeyemi Olatunji, 40-year-old lawyer, says “Men are not scarce that it is on social media that one will be coming to source for them. Anyway, a social media friend you aren’t close to can’t be considered as a friend so it makes no sense to send a friend request to the person’s husband. Let’s not pretend; I can bet that most of those requests can never be because of how interesting his timeline is. It is always most times a case of monitoring spirit. If you claim his timeline is interesting that means he made it public. Isn’t that enough for you, why send a friend request?”

Onyekachi Eze, 39-year-old nurse, asks “If he accepts what next? Your number of friends will increase by one and then what again? Tell me that you won’t send an inbox message to him. He will just be there as your inactive friend. Perhaps someday, you will inquire about his wife and kids and that will be all. So many illicit affairs weren’t preplanned. It’s one thing leading to the other and before you know what, the devil will strike.”

Amina Muhammed, 40-year-old teacher, says “Know your boundaries and respect them. Do not cross the respect line. Married men should not be your focus. Leave them alone. I think Lucky Dube sang a song alone those lines. The earlier we realize that we are both humans and fallible, the more conscious we will be in avoiding occasion of sin that might lead us to sin. Stay in your lane and respect this marriage institution.”