FIVE BOOKS ON CARING FOR PARENTS

When the bible says, “Honour your father and your mother so that your days will be long”, it was not just talk. It has been proven many times that those who honour and care for their parents have done better in life. Indeed, all the holy books direct us and admonish us to care for our parents. Today across generations there is a near complete absence in caring for parents, be they elderly parents or young ones. The elderly suffer abuse from their children including violent attacks, theft and emotional bullying. Disrespect is now like pure water and parents are at their wits end on what to do with their unruly children. Parents are God’s representative on earth and must be treated well if our lives are to become anything to be proud of. In this millennial generation, there is a lot of self-entitlement and selfishness. But more than anything else, we all must commit to caring and loving our parents no matter how difficult it seems. Start the decade by making up with your parents. It is critical to your emotional and spiritual wellbeing. Do not let a spouse or friend drive a wedge between you and your parents. The consequences are not pleasant. If they pass without you making up with them, it haunts you for the rest of your life. I know some parents can be difficult but they are ours, let’s find ways to deal with them. Generally, parents are trying their best to give us the best, they put us through school, make sacrifices, deny themselves and look out for you physically and spiritually. Our reward should not be disrespect or failure to care for them. Make a commitment to care for your parents better, starting now. Here are books to illuminate you on this.

1. I have been a bit concerned about youth restiveness occasioned by lack of jobs and poor social placement but I do not think young people should take it out on their parents. Many Parents are heartbroken that their kids are jobless. Adding vitriol to that feeling is when a child becomes negatively disruptive, permanently angry and thinks it’s their parents’ fault. Dude, they paid your school fees and still feed you. Do not be selfish. The new ‘Marlian’ movement that seems funny now is a big disruption, and Naira Marley proponent of this negative movement encourages our children to be all things negative. This is no good and reminds us of the youth movement in America, that led to the violent American pop-culture today. A book to help us make sense of all of this negativity and rising youth pop-culture of disrespect and going against social norms is the seminal book, “We are the people our parents warned us about” written by Journalist, Nicholas Von Hoffman. The book is about the youth counterculture in America starting in San Francisco in the 6o’s. Youths clustered in major cities in America, broke narcotics laws proudly, publicly and defiantly. The youths drew domestic and international attention to itself and birthed a new American sub-culture including a high level of disrespect for constituted authority including parents. America never recovered. We should all be guided and guarded in these difficult times.

2. When our Parents need us most by David Mckena Waterbrook. This is a book that gives us guidelines for helping our ageing parents manage better. How to help them face retirement, assisting them with financial decisions, handling your emotions while parenting your parents and coping with physical and emotional change. In addition, it provides guidelines on assisting them better their spiritual lives. A good book.

3. 60’s is the new 20’s by Margie Taylor. This is an excellent book to gift your ageing parents. Written by a boomer herself, it’s a boomer’s guide to ageing with grace, dignity and what’s left of your self-respect. Its tongue in cheek and hilarious.When I finally write my long-awaited cookbook, I will borrow this brilliant idea and put some of my mother’s cooking tricks and recipes in it.

4. Loving our Parents, Stories of duties and obligation. Abdulmalik Mujahid. These are a collection of stories by ordinary individuals about how to care for one’s parents. An incredibly beautiful book.

5. A guide for the 21st century on caring for the aged by Wilson Simmons III. This is a guide for helping us through managing those who cared for us all our lives when they are no longer physically strong. There are shifts now in physical prowess, teaching senior driving skills and discerning mental skills as well as holistic approaches in managing the elderly.

BONUS BOOKS: Dutifulness to Parents: In the light of the Qu’ranand authentic Sunah Unselfie, Why empathetic kids succeed in our All-about-me world by Michelle Borah who discerns that there is an empathy crisis in today’s world. Parental care in Mammals edited by David Aubernick and Peter Klopfer. This book pretty much shows us how mammals care for their offspring, their societal organisation and how offspring care for their parents. An example of how in many instances some animals are showing us the way.