As Obama fall my hand, harper rises to the rescue

But Obama moved from being the most qualified black man to step on Mandela’s shoes to getting set to retire on the opposite side of popularity. He could not summon his party chairman to invoke the magic wand; he had no Mr. Fix It; he did not engage in roforofo or mud fight to save his party or the black heritage. He could not mobilise dark-skinned people to see the pogrom that awaits them.
This Barack could not rage fire into Florida, cut them down in Connecticut and make them cancel the votes in Kansas. This Hussein could not rally Islam the third largest faith in America to dumb down the war-hungry Republicans. He could not make video clips to rally immigrants into avoiding deportation. He did not get Jesse Jackson to fly drones across republican strongholds or get Aliyu Farakanmi, aka Louis Farrakhan to carve out a caliphate for PDP. This incumbent PDP man sat down in Washington DC while a rampaging APC, overran his presidency. How does he connect with Uhuru Kenyatta’s network to speak to his grandmother or his cousins without being sniggered at?
Yes, because Obama disgraced the black race, all hell is breaking loose. Canada, an otherwise dark-friendly nation is baring the fangs of an angry bear roused from its winter hibernation. Last week Ottawa announced a series of moves aimed at tackling a race which bungles its chance to make global impact at every opportunity.
While African nations were playing the ostrich since Ebola was discovered in 1976, Canada’s scientists have been awake and working for a vaccine to the end that it now has the most effective bullet against Ebola. Notwithstanding, Stephen Harper has closed his consuls in Liberia, Guinea and Sierra Leone due to compelling needs to protect Canadian citizens against the new ‘black plague’. Only true Canadians can fly in or out from those places. Every other passenger is an avoidable risk who should die in Africa where land is cheap and available because funerals are very expensive in Canada. Eat your heart out Angelique Kidjo.
But the grandmother of all laws is the proposed Zero Tolerance for Barbaric Cultural Practices Act tabled last week in Ottawa. It prohibits polygamists, the worst personification of barbarism from immigrating to Canada. If Obama’s father had been alive, by the contents of The Audacity of Hope, he would have been barred. Who knows what happens to the fruit of
barbaric parentage who though manage to keep peace in their harem are barbarously opposed to bestiality and homosexuality even between usually consenting adults.
It would seem that the barbaric race is doomed finally. While at it, Quebec, (which by the way is still part of greater Canada) unveiled a video revealing its own definition of barbarism – being a teetotaller or unable to recognise the quality of wines. If Obama had not tried to play the card of democracy like Bill Clinton or George Bush, mkomboti, paraga and shekpe would have been assimilated into the Quebec vat, saving us the headache of cramming jaw breaking French names.
For ages, Africans have been only good at one thing – entertainment. Turn in your grave Arthur Ashe and eat your heart out the Williams Sisters, a coup against your soul Cassius Clay because your prison yard of entertainment is bulldozed. I don’t follow the round leather game except when the Falconets are playing in Montreal. However, the BBC never cease to regale me with pitiful stories of fans making monkey and baboon sounds when balls pass between black balls. A certain coach would not hire more Africans because other players are having enough trouble finding the real ball under the hunky legs of dark players who bring no intelligence to play but brute force. No apologies to Amokachi nicknamed ‘The Bull’.
Even if they are not listening to Louis Farrakhan, black people should fear conspiracy theories. Who rides the ocean waves in dug-out canoes waiting for rescue in Lampedusa? Who turns themselves into shark meat? Who becomes desert-baked sausage for vultures and owls? Whose lines are the longest on the immigration queue? Whose intellectual is likely to be an asylum seeker?  Whose president orders the detention of a journalist for his critical reporting of Ebola? Who ruins their nation rather than run with the people’s dreams?
Certainly it is not Stephen Harper.