Our phones are modern day communication tools which can be found with everyone irrespective of social status. It follows us everywhere. A phone call, a Facebook notification, an Instagram like and the list continues.
But there may be a distraction somewhere because since the invention of these phones and other hand held devices, they can either be aptly described as a blessing, or a curse. Why? This is because the more time we spend in the cyber world makes us lose appreciation of the real world hence we do not enjoy what happens.
Whether you are in a relationship with someone, interviewing someone, or just meeting someone for the first time, there is a special quality that comes with having face-to-face interactions. You can hear the tone in their voice, see their facial expression as it changes, depending on the mood and you can look them in the eye to see if you trust them. Life Xtra sought to know how attached some respondents are to their cell phones.
Maryam Abubakar, who is in her mid-20s, says: “I really get pissed off when I see someone getting so attached to an ordinary gadget like a phone. When I was in the university, I had a roommate who is ‘lost’ when using her phone. The most annoying thing is that when you check what she is doing, she’s either on Whatsapp or Facebook, chatting away with friends.”
She adds that: “I don’t get to read chats because I don’t pry into people’s privacy but I can tell you that most of the chats are purely irrelevant discussions. There should be restrictions to everything because for all that we have to do, there is a time for everything on earth. Giving too much attention to an item can be quantified to someone who is addicted to drugs.”
Using herself as an example, Ifunanya Ofomadu, an architect, said she is very attached to her phone, though not only for chatting but also to gain easy access to information that is work-related. “Though some of my friends have complained about how engrossed I am with my phone such that I forget myself, I don’t see it that way. The time I spend surfing the net with my phone is a mode of relaxation for me. I read online publications, chat and view other people’s profiles and pictures; at other times, I watch videos online.” She stressed that this makes her happy as helps her to relax.
Patricia Idama, a fiftyish businesswoman, stated that: “This cell phone issue has become a problem with many youths.” Citing an experience with her daughter, she added that: “I have a 23-year-old daughter and when she is on the phone, it becomes a problem to get her attention and I have even made it a rule that whenever it is her turn to make meals for the family, she must not be seen with her phone so that she would not burn what she is cooking.”
She added that: “Giving too much attention to material things is not good and that is what I keep telling my daughter. Everyone should learn to rule and control material things like phones, not the other way round.”
An article in the UK Telegraph titled: ‘Mobile phone addiction ruining relationships,’ Richard Alleyne quotes Dr. James Roberts of Baylor’s Hankamer School of Business, in Texas, as saying that “instant messaging” addiction is driven by “materialism and impulsiveness.”
Roberts adds that: “Mobile phones are a part of our consumer culture. They are not just a consumer tool, but are used as a status symbol. They’re also eroding our personal relationships.”
Alleyne says: “getting hooked on a mobile phone is similar to other addictions, such as compulsive buying and credit card misuse.”
Mark Glaser says in another article titled, ‘How Cell Phones Are Killing Face-to-Face Interactions,’ on Mediashift.org, that: “It’s unfortunate that real-life interactions are on the outs as cell phone conversations, texting, instant messaging and Facebook emails start to take up more of our time. For young people especially, having a cell phone or iPod in hand and at the ready is the default mode while walking the streets. That means much less chance of conversation with the people who populate their real lives.”
Sunday Ibe, a computer technician in his early thirties explains that: “Technology is growing and advancing at a very quick speed that a lot of people are barely aware of how it is affecting their behaviour and how the most important relationships are threatened.”
Ibe added that he has a friend whose sister is always on the phone pinging or chatting via other means, even when she is washing, she is with her phone.
“There was a time I visited my friend and he asked her to get us something to eat. She didn’t respond immediately. My friend had to get up from where he sat and snatched the phone from her before she went to do what she was asked. It’s really annoying to see how engrossed some people can be with their phones, even while in the company of others. I personally hate it,” he stressed.
Asked what he would do if he had a sister or another close relative who was always engrossed with her phone that she forgets herself, Ibe said: “I would caution my sister twice about her attitude and if she doesn’t show any sign of change, then I might just do it the hard way by seizing the phone for a while to ensure that she learns her lesson before I give it back to her.”