Are bridal showers necessary?

These days, bridal showers are now seen as ways to provide a bride-to-be with gifts and take pictures, have fun and wish her the best in her ‘new home.’ Yes, everyone wants to have fun with friends before getting married but is a bridal shower necessary? LifeXtra takes a look.

A wedding shower is a common event that usually precedes a wedding.  A lot of brides look forward to this phase of their lives with so much eagerness, but are unaware of its origin. 

According to Wikipedia, the custom of the bridal shower was said to have grown out of earlier dowry practices where a poor woman’s family might not have money to provide a dowry or when a father refused to give his daughter her dowry because he did not approve of the marriage.

In addition, morningjournal.com states that “Bridal showers are designed to equip couples with many of the necessities to start their new life together. This custom is believed to have evolved from an old dowry system, in which a bride was expected to bring valuables to the marriage. The dowry was originally intended as compensation for the burden of supporting a wife placed on the groom. Some parents of the bride were not rich enough to afford an ample dowry, so friends and family members would offer small gifts to help offset this financial responsibility.”

But what is a bridal shower? It is a fun occasion where a bride’s close friends and family members come to spend time together before the big day, but it’s also practical, as guests “shower” the bride-to-be with gifts to help her “set up” a home with her future spouse.

Since it has become a rising trend in recent times, LifeXtra sought to know what people’s opinions was on the matter.

Rejoice Iliya, an Abuja-based undergraduate gave a two-fold answer. She said, “There are advantages and disadvantages. One of the advantages is that you have fun with your friends. And it is also the last time to have fun as a single lady because some husbands don’t allow their wives go out with friends, so it’s good.”

She added “It’s nice, but to me is not necessary because it is a waste of money. Most people spend a lot of money for almost a whole week, bachelor’s eve, bridal showers and many more but end up filing a divorce after a few months. However, it’s good to celebrate but to me all those things are a waste of useful resources and just to show off.”

Also speaking to LifeXtra, Nduk Blessing Karick said “Bridal showers are meant to bring people together so that they could surprise the lady prior to her wedding day. This happens mostly when the bride’s parents cannot afford to buy her wedding gifts. But in the African context, bridal showers have been redefined as an occasion where the brides’ friends come together, to celebrate the bride being single and moving into her matrimonial home.

“Is it necessary? It is a ‘no.’ why? Because the only achievement is the advice a lady could get from any responsible woman without gathering a certain group of people, to waste time and resources. Instead, such person should channel her time and money and put it into good use after the wedding. It could be of good help, rather than using it to impress certain people. But if the lady has the resources, then she could go ahead with it,” she concluded.

Another respondent, Plangnan Obianuju Michael, who is in her mid-20s, said “it is not necessary because I see it as a waste of money. The whole thing is meant for presenting the bride-to-be with gifts but today, the whole thing has been turned to something else. The bride is the one who spends the money on the ladies that are with her. She buys some items for her friends and then they take pictures and post online. What for? Just to show off. “To me, it’s unnecessary,” she concluded.