A painless goodbye

Goodbye they say is the hardest word to say to someone you cherish. Sometimes, you want to say good bye but you cannot get the words because deep in your heart saying goodbye would just be a lie. Good bye is a word of sorrow.

“Good bye is the hardest thing to do especially if you love someone and that person is not responding, but sometimes it’s for the best. It hurts and pierces your heart as you have to let go of the person and forge ahead with life. It is easy to say hello to your loved ones but hard to say goodbyes to them especially if there are moments you have both shared. I have been through that situation and it made me sick for almost two months” says Ben Obi, a banker in Abuja.

Someone once asked “if endings symbolize beginnings, why are goodbyes so hard to say? Tearing ourselves away from people who mean a lot to us is one of the most painful things that can happen to you but when situations become inevitable there is no other option than to end up saying the goodbyes. Goodbyes must not necessarily be one of hatred and anger, there are ways that goodbyes can be said and those involved can still remain friends, rather than become enemies.

Goodbyes do not really have to mean the end, “as we grow older we all come to terms that nothing is permanent in our life and somewhere along the line circumstances and situations happen beyond our control. Saying goodbye to a loved one is something nobody anticipates but when it comes there is nothing that can be done about it. We have lost dear ones and that is one painful goodbye, especially if you were not in good terms with the person before the person died. Once a goodbye is said to signify the end of a relationship, there is always going to be an emotional stress that comes along with it, it’s not easy” says Safiya Kareem, a nurse.

“Saying goodbye, it is a part of human experience that we encounter every day, sometimes nonchalantly, sometimes with great emotion. Saying goodbye comes in many different forms. There are goodbyes that mean goodbye forever; there are those that just mean the normal temporary goodbye. Such departing farewells as “goodbye, see you” do not create the same impact as the permanent one. These we say casually. But what if you are saying it to end a relationship permanently? It is never really the same with the everyday goodbye we use; it definitely brings pain and hatred between the parties involved. Unless they are extra ordinarily mature in their sense of understanding and realize that such a relationship cannot forge ahead” says a Bridget Chris, a media consultant.

“Were is the “good” in goodbye? Asks Jemima Audu, an undergraduate of University of Abuja. “There is nothing good in goodbye. Why add the good when at the end of it all you do is causing trauma and pain to the other party. Do you know what it means to say goodbye for ever to someone you have shared so many things with?

Saying goodbye is not easy for the person saying it and the person it is being said to. Do not be dismayed at goodbyes; there are some goodbyes that we cannot run away from notwithstanding the pain it is going to cause. If only we take a minute to realise that saying goodbyes for the benefit of both parties is beneficial, we would realize that there is so much more than the word goodbye itself. Though most people say goodbyes only to cause pain and agony to others, this is wrong and not fair.

Saying goodbye is not the hardest part, what we leave behind is what matters. Goodbyes are necessary for us to meet again after a lifetime apart, meeting again is certain for those that are bound forever to be friends, no matter the circumstances that led to the breakup.