Children, they say, are the fruits and benefits of a marriage. In Africa, especially, it’s common to expect child/children from couples in the first or second year of their marriage. So, it becomes a sensitive issue when the marriage does not produce children as and when expected. Today, many couples seek the alternative route of adopting kids instead of waiting forever to have theirs. However, this option is still trailed by criticisms. LifeXtra takes a look at varying views about the issue.
Children are gifts from God and blood doesn’t make one family. You can be related to someone by marriage and law. But some people see things differently. They don’t buy into the idea of adopting children, while others don’t mind accepting children they are not related to by blood.
Adamu Baba Aminu, 46-year-old Zamfara resident, doesn’t believe in adopting children. He said, “I don’t believe in adopting children because I don’t know where those children are from. I do not discriminate. I can train them and cater for them but I wouldn’t adopt them into my family. I have so many experiences of things like this. Some children will cause you harm in the future because they are not related to you. So, it is better to be kind to these children, help them in any way you can. Just do what you can do for God and leave the rest.
Janet Chibueze, 38-year-old nurse based in Lagos, doesn’t think adopting children is a big deal. “Adopting children is not a problem for me. In fact, one of my children is adopted. I will not mention the name of child. I have always loved children who don’t have people to fend for them. And fortunately for me, I married a man who shares my views and ideologies. He didn’t object when I brought up the matter. People should not be reluctant to take in children that probably don’t have parents and people to love them. I don’t have any regret that I adopted one of my children. I treat them equally and that is how people should behave,” she said.
Thirty seven-year-old Kingsley Nwankwo, a businessman, said he is open to adopting children and that he hopes Nigerians stop being shallow minded. “I don’t know if it’s just me but Nigerians are so shallow-minded. You will hear people saying that they don’t know the health history of the child they are adopting. That is not an excuse. Anything can happen to anybody, even that child you gave birth to. So, I would be open to adopting children. I am totally fine with it,” he said.
Emmanuella Salami, 36, told LifeXtra that she wouldn’t mind doing that. “When you want to do something like that, you have to do your research very well. You must go through all the legal processes of course. Aside the process, I wouldn’t mind adopting a child. But if you choose to do this, make sure you are able to treat them equally. Once you adopt them, they have become your biological children. If you can do that, then you are good to go,” she said.