Why you may be finding it difficult to get married

Many singles are complaining that it is getting more difficult to get married either because they are not finding the right person or because of their poor economic circumstances. But the real problem may not be what you think. There are people in the Bible who had problems getting married who otherwise would have loved to enjoy the privilege of matrimony. As I studied this, a clear pattern began to emerge. Let us look at five groups.

1. VICTIMS OF TRADITION

In Genesis 29:21-30, we read the account of how Jacob fell in love with Rachael, Laban’s daughter and had to serve seven years for her. A wedding party was called for Jacob to receive his bride, but alas, it was her elder sister Leah that was given to Jacob. He and Rachael were swindled. Reason? The younger one cannot marry before the elder because of tradition. Here we see tradition working against Rachael. Many are single today because tradition and culture forbid them to marry outside of the town, tribe or social class. Behind every tradition is a spirit. May God deliver you from the spirit of tradition. Tradition assisted Leah to get married but could not sustain her in marriage nor guarantee her a happy marriage. Religious traditions kept many people single and sinning.

2. VICTIMS OF PARENTAL VOW

Jephthah’s daughter is a good example. Her father made a vow before he went to war that he would offer unto God the first thing that comes from his house if God would help him win the war. It was rash and foolish, but a vow is a vow. We know the story. His daughter came out and had to be offered. I believe in service to the Lord, so she remained a virgin. (Judges 11:30-40).

Vows made by people who have relational authority over you could have telling effects. You must cancel every ancestral vow or pronouncements that are capable of hindering your fortunes in marriage, business or ministry. Samuel, on the other hand, was a beneficiary of a positive parental vow. (1Samuel 1:11, “And she vowed a vow, and said, O LORD of hosts, if thou wilt indeed look on the affliction of thine handmaid, and remember me, and not forget thine handmaid, but wilt give unto thine handmaid a man child, then I will give him unto the LORD all the days of his life, and there shall no razor come upon his head.”)

3. VICTIMS OF PARENTAL MANIPULATION

In 1Samuel 18:17-21. King Saul had promised to give his daughter Merab to David in marriage, but he failed to deliver. But he later gave Micah to David for a very interesting reason; ‘to be a snare to him’. When parents insist on their children marrying a particular person without divine guidance, the devil is setting a trap. I pray the Lord will deliver you from every parental manipulation. Micah did not enjoy her marriage. There was a long interruption, but even after they got back together, she ended up being barren.

4. VICTIMS OF ANCESTRAL MORAL PROBLEMS

A good example of this is Tamar, Absalom’s beautiful sister. She was attracted to the wrong person and raped because of ancestral moral problems dating back not only as far as her father David but as far as Judah. The Bible says she remained desolate in her brother Absalom’s house 2Samuel 13:20b, “So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom’s house.” Read 2Samuel 13:1-32. Are you attracting the wrong persons in your life? Do people want you only for your body? Are you prone to immoral relationships? You will need to repent of ancestral moral sins and be delivered.

5.VICTIMS OF ENVIRONMENTAL CIRCUMSTANCES

After Lot escaped with his daughters from Sodom, they went to Zoar. There, his daughters conspired to rape him one after the other to conceive by him while he was under the influence of alcohol. Terrible! Genesis 19:20-38. Their reason was “there is not a man in the earth”. They were locked up in a land of ‘no man’. You could be in a large church or community and still be in ‘a land of no man ’. Here is the danger: whenever women feel they can no longer find suitable men to marry them, they resort to ungodly means to have children and become single parents. Genesis 19:31-32, “And the firstborn said unto the younger, Our father is old, and there is not a man in the earth to come in unto us after the manner of all the earth: [32] Come, let us make our father drink wine, and we will lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father.”

The devil worked on their minds and they believed a lie. Don’t believe the lie of the devil, there is someone to marry you. He will find you if you just believe God and depend on Him to connect you to him.

This is how desert spirits operate. They peddle lies. They isolate you and convince you that men are scarce and that your time is past. It makes you not to be able to see beyond your walls. You could be in the midst of a crowd and still feel isolated! Desert spirits make you feel rejected and forsaken. They make you feel inadequate. You could be pretty and feel ugly and unwanted. But you must believe God loves you and will answer your prayers and give you a husband or wife. You will also need to go for deliverance to be rid of this spirit.

Every wall of isolation is being destroyed, in Jesus name. Bind and cast out the spirit of abandonment and loneliness in Jesus name.

NO EXCUSE

Leah was not beautiful, but she got married.

Ruth and Abigail were young widows, but they got married.

Esther was in exile in a foreign land, but she got married to the king.

Mary was pregnant with a child that did not belong to the man she was engaged to, but she got married.

What is your situation? It does not matter. God has a solution; He has a spouse for you. You are not too old or too messed up. You are God’s princess. He desires to plant you in your own family. Depend on Him and serve Him wholeheartedly and He will grant you the desires of your heart. You can be set free from desert spirits and curses with targeted prayers.

Bishop Dr. Charles Olowojoba is the General Overseer of Dayspring Bible Church Worldwide with HQ in Abuja, Nigeria & President, Dayspring Christian Ministries Int’l.