May your loyalty not be tested

Although I believe that the grandmother of all screenings begins the day the sinnate invites the man his fanatical followers call the Lion of Ubima, Rotimi Chibuike Amaechi; sparks from last week’s fireworks must not go unnoticed. Saraki must be congratulated for heeding the advise of the elders who say that when a man is tagged a hawk, he steers clear of the chicken coup. As an accused standing in the Code of Conduct Tribunal, CCT dock, Saraki confessed that his sin had nothing to do with what is now known as anticipatory declaration but his decision to stand as President of the Sinnate. Resuming from two unearned holidays,  this president discharged himself creditably as the veritable commander of his troops.
While one is still waiting for what roles would go to the likes of Abike Dabiri-Erewa, Lola Shoneyin and Kayode Ogundamisi and Kadaria Ahmed, the ministerial parade has proved to be a dash of hope in the admixture of uncertainty. Forget those complaining that the questions were jejune forgetting that an apple does not fall far from its tree. I would rather ignore the fact that only a few members of our legislative chamber have depth. Let’s focus on those whose intervention or questions could have changed the rules of moral debate but who kept diplomatic silence during the ministerial screening.
Champagne Dino Melaye must have been saying a big ‘amen’ to Raji Fashola’s prayer of the year – may our loyalty not be tested? If Buruji Kashamu had asked questions, what would it have been? There are extinguished sinnators who came to be seen and not to be heard. Perhaps if the constitution is amended to allow deliberations in the local languages, things would have been more boisterous. Some questions are better asked in vernacular because their long English translations and stiff presentation shows why there is money to be made from the red chambers if you a speech therapists or reading coach.
As a Yoruba shon of the shoil, Fashola, must have been referring to his lot since standing down from being governor of Lagos State. He was favoured for the top job up until lately when buried vouchers bloomed in the media. Like the American Colin Powell after the Iraq War, Fashola chose to read the political thermometer correctly, waiting for the proper signal from the Generalissimo of Oodua politics, and leader of the Asiwaju Peoples Congress, APC, Bola Tinubu. As the elders say, when a child knows how to wash his hands, he would eat with the elders.
For knowing his place as they say in Lagos Fashola became Sai Baba’s portmanteau on most of his now legendary foreign tours leading to speculations that he might wind up either as chief of staff or chief scribe. Both positions were filled and Fashola was still hanging there. As the vouchers started dropping, people swore that he would be lucky to make membership of a board parastatal. Of course, nothing tests your loyalty like uncertainty, but when the man you were asked to install as successor begins to air your grimy linens outside the dryer, your heart is bound to skip beats. Tinubu has called a truce but it does not appear to be standing. What other voucher manifests after inauguration would determine another level of loyalty test. So here is my amendment to Fashola’s prayer, may our loyalties not be tested beyond our endurance capacity – amen!
For Amaechi, one hopes that he has returned home to appease the gods so that he does not become the Obanikoro of the process. He would need to say a quick amen to Fashola’s prayers and hope that it favours him as much as it favoured Lai Mohammed whose ayes and nays narrowly missed an abnormal vote that could have rewritten the rules of screening. This is another area where Saraki has shown himself as a player in the game and where, if he continues might shock and surprise even his worst critics. A scenario where the president of the sinnate disqualifies his kinsman could have grave consequences for politics at the home where the police agreed that people threw sachets of water but where the stoned denied it. It would appear that the police arrested some people for anticipatory offences.
Yes, hope is the last currency in Naija that has not lost its value. It was available in these nominees or appointees. There were the traditional bow and go crowd as well as stellar performances showing clarity, vision and focus. The resumes were intimidating as we guess who goes where. With this list, but for his distrust of youth, Sai Baba apparently listened to Naija women while showing his soft spot for lawyers. If this cabinet fails, we may have to recall President Jones from observer missions and publicly apologize for kicking him out of six years of slumber. May the loyalty of these ones to Naija not be tested!