Children are very smart and sensitive to changes around them. Have we as mothers sat to look at the kind and number of nannies we introduce into our children’s lives at their tender age?
For some women they can change nannies twice a year and it continues like that till the child grows up. These women tend to forget that these different nannies are different individuals that come with their own different identities and ways of life, thereby introducing new things and ways to the child.
Rukaiya Muktar, a 38-year-old educationist shares her thoughts on the issue thus: “Kids are smart and they learn how to manage the adults in their lives quite fast and that is why we need to be careful the rate we introduce people responsible for their well-being. Since these nannies spend more time with them they will naturally follow their ways of life and instructions but when these nannies are changed too often there will be a clash of identity and this isn’t good for the child.”
Introducing a new nanny could also affect the nutrition of your child, says Ajoke Adegoke, a 42-year-old civil servant: “A well-trained nanny should know how to cook but introducing different nannies into your child’s life will only alter his diet because every nanny comes with her own culinary skills. No two people cook the same way. At the stage at which nannies are responsible for kids, parents lose control of what their kids eat. They feel it’s the responsibility of the nanny to make sure they get the required balanced diet which most times the nannies are not aware of. Nannies tend to cook what is convenient for them and not what is expected of them.”
Adobi Okoye, a 45-year-old matron in one of the government schools in Abuja, believes that children begin to lose self-confidence with frequent changes of nannies: “The child who has different nannies introduced to him even if its every year, will surely have self-confidence issues. He will feel the parents don’t have time for him and even at that, different people keep coming in to rule his life. He doesn’t know how to express the pains and ends up in tantrums for every new nanny that comes. His tantrums are not just for fun but for the stress of getting to know and follow the rules of a new nanny all over again. With this kind of trend the child will grow up having self-confidence and identity issues.”
The frequent change of nannies in a child’s life sends a signal that you as a parent cannot be trusted. This is not to say that if you find something wrong with a nanny you shouldn’t try to correct it. But if we keep changing nannies then the child grows up with the belief that you as a person cannot be trusted to make a definite decision in life.
We need the trust and confidence of our kids as it regards nannies. Both your nanny and kids should be able to express whatever difficulties they might have relating to each other and it is also important that you try to resolve whatever problem they might have. This way you are teaching your child the essence of relating with people who might not be necessarily in the same class or category with him/she in life.
Most importantly, as parents caution should be taken on how we address and communicate with nannies that are responsible for our kids while we are away. The way we talk and relate with these nannies is the same way the kids will want to relate with them. If we have a negative relationship with the nannies then you can be sure that the kids will also have a negative one with them. And this does not only stop there, but the kid will also grow with that kind of orientation that you can talk nasty to those who work for you.
We should understand that nannies spend more time with our kids, so it is important we study and understand the type of nannies that we entrust our kids to because since the kids spend more time with them, there is the likelihood of their orientation and characters impacted on the child. Frequent change of nannies automatically results in an identity crises and finding a balance in life.