‘Are you leaving already?’ I asked Tahir’s cousin Muktar, when I saw him rising from his chair in the sitting room. ‘I thought you will be joining us to break your fast here since you too are observing the sitta shawwal.’
‘No, he will be going home to his sweet bride. Who said he’ll have appetite for your food when his darling wife is busy feeding him great delicacies?’ My husband joked before his cousin could answer.
‘Actually, I am not going home to eat. I’m thinking of stopping by at a restaurant nearby to break my fast.’Muktar explained.
‘But why eat at a restaurant when you can just join us here to have your iftar?’ I asked.
‘Or when he can just go home and eat what his wife cooked. Or did she travel?’ Tahir queried.
‘No, in fact she is around but … ‘ Muktar began before his cousin interrupted him.
‘But you had a lover’s quarrel so you don’t want to eat her food.’ Tahir concluded for him.
‘Oh Tahir it doesnt have to be something negative. She could be pregnant and cannot stand the smell of food being cooked so he spares her the trouble and decides to eat outside.’ I offered. ‘No it’s nothing that positive Aunty Bint. In truth I really decided not to eat what Hasida cooked for the next three days.’ He replied.
‘You see, I told you, we men know exactly what’s happening in one another’s lives. No man who is newly married will want to eat outside his home unless there is a problem there. As for you Muktar, that’s not the way to settle a lover’s quarrel. How can you resolve not to eat her dood over some small misunderstanding? The two of you are just starting to live with each other, you should be more accommodating of her mistakes.’ Tahir advised.
‘It’s not an ordinary lover’s quarrel Yaya Tahir. Its a situation that’s getting out of control and unless I do something drastic it can’t be contained.’ Muktar explained, enigmatically.
‘Please be more specific young man, dont speak to us in riddles.’ Tahir warned, in mock seriousness. Muktar moved back to the chair he vacated and looked up at aTahir.
‘I will tell you what this is all about then you can decide if I was really over-reacting. In the last six months we have been married Hasida had tried to stop me from acts of charity more times than I can remember. She keeps demanding why I decided to give something out, why I thought someone was the right person to receive, or why should I give a certain amount when what she suggested will suffice. The moment she first arrived she demanded to know why she should feed all the domestic help I have. I told her it’s because they all live with us and all had a duty they perform daily. You know I had a driver, a houseboy, a gardener and a cook long before I married because my bank was ready to pay for them. I retained them after our marriage but her first move as their new boss was how to starve them. She even said feeding them thrice a day was an extravagance. I stood my ground that these were people who live in our house 24 hours a day and do not close and go home so they should be fed as many times as we feed our selves. She gave up on that and began to torture me in other ways. The moment I mention helping someone she will be up in arms against it. I got fed up and warned her that if she did it again I will stop eating her food and if it continued I will send her home to her parents and tell them she was making my life hell with her meanness.’ Muktar concluded.
‘Can it be that you don’t give her enough, that you are more generous to outsiders than to her?’ I asked.
‘No Aunty Bint, I’ve always been very generous to her. I give her pocket money every week. And I still do all the shopping for our household items. Her money is just for her to spend as she wished. You can ask her to confirm. Any way, when she cornered me yesterday and said I shouldn’t give a certain amount of money to our driver, whose wife had delivered, I told her she has crossed the limit, that I will not eat her meals for three days. I mean it is bad enough that I have to battle the 70 devils in my head, how can I survive if I keep confronting a real life 71st devil?’ He asked rhetorically.