I have always been indifferent to beauty pageants for personal reasons, but this year, I followed the Miss Universe contest for obvious reasons. I stumbled onto Chidimma Adetshina’s story—as I often do—on social media. Unless you haven’t been paying attention to the news at all, you already know Chidimma’s story, so I won’t get into how she was bullied out of South Africa, accepted the Nigerian Miss Universe organiser’s invitation to contest in Nigeria, and ended up as the first runner-up. At every step of the way—publicly, at least—she has shown uncommon grace and maturity.
Before she took part in Miss South Africa, she was a regular South African with a Nigerian father. She was sure of her identity. And then, suddenly, this fundamental part of her identity was being questioned. Everything she had taken for granted turned into a stick to beat and berate her with, simply because she dared to contest with a name like hers. Imagine how traumatic it must be to wake up and discover that not only is your mother being accused of identity fraud, but that those you considered your community—including government officials, perhaps even people who knew you personally, people you went to school with—were discussing you on public platforms and casting aspersions on your character.
And yet, she was resilient enough to pick herself up, represent Nigeria, and shine through the contest. Nigeria gave her an opportunity, and she used it well. She carried herself like a queen on the Miss Universe stage, and there are some who believe that she should have won. It’s easy to forget, because of how she’s carried herself, that Chidimma was born in 2001. She is only 23 years old. In any contemporary culture, while she is of age, she is still a young adult. To go through what she has in such a painful and public way, and yet have the courage to begin again with the Nigerian pageantry (she wasn’t given a free pass to represent Nigeria; she thoroughly earned it, no matter what anyone thinks), is a lesson for us all in how to deal with setbacks.
You don’t sit at home and cry “woe is me,” or come on social media to insult faceless cowards and engage in unproductive arguments. Instead, you rise above the noise. You pick yourself up, lean on whatever support you have, and stay focused. And yes, you risk failing—but anyone who is afraid of failure isn’t ready to succeed. I watched with maternal pride when she was named first runner-up. She vindicated herself, and that ought to have been the end of the attacks on her.
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Regrettably, instead of celebrating her win, some Nigerians have begun to castigate her for referring to South Africa as home in an interview. I have seen people I know—folks with children younger than Chidimma, who ought to know better—spend data nitpicking and attacking this young woman over something as deeply personal as where she considers home. It is exhausting. Home is not just a physical place; it’s our experiences, our memories, our relationships, and our familiars. For Chidimma, South Africa is undeniably that, and her referring to it as home should not be controversial. It’s the reason why Enugu will always be home to me, even though it isn’t my state of origin.
And yes, while Chidimma was forced to quit the contest in South Africa in a painful way, she was born and raised there. It is where her memories were formed. It is where her family presumably still lives. It’s also probably where she will go to university, as she has plans to get a law degree. It’s not likely she will choose a Naija university over a South African one, even if one of our universities waived all entrance requirements for her. Home may not always treat us right, but that doesn’t stop it from being home.
So please, can you all get off Chidimma’s back already? The Miss Nigeria Universe organisation stepped in and offered her the opportunity to contest and represent Nigeria (and her gratitude is well documented). But beyond her thankfulness, do you also want her blood? Her life? For her to publicly renounce South Africa? Enough already! She came, she saw, she conquered.
Go, Chidimma!!!
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