Now, between the mother and father, who should you confide in in relationship matters? Lifextra spoke to a cross section of Nigerians.
A tutor, Agbona Rilwan Olamide, said that if he is as mandated to make a choice, “then it will be dad.”
Why? Olamide said “Simply because I would like his view on the issue since he may have encountered something like that. And from his opinion, I can hopefully make a good decision.”
He explained that because they are both male, they may have had similar experiences.
A civil servant, Oyeinkuro Quronickel Gabriel, opted for his mother. He said “I’ll say my mum because at the moment she’s the one I can access 100 percent.”
A young mother, Faith Odion, said she’d choose her mother because “I lost my dad at an early age so I really didn’t get to know him well.”
However, Faith feels gender should play an important role on who a person should seek relationship advice from. She said a female should choose her mother because “She’s a woman like me, she would understand me better. I feel she would understand my pains, fears and success because she must have been through some of my experiences.”
A data analyst, Mal Moussa, feels if you really need to hear the truth then you should choose your father. “I will go for my father when it comes to relationship matters. People tend to involve family members or close friends who will take sides with them. But to be sincere, if the truth must be told, I will go for my daddy’s opinion. He will speak from a very less emotional perceptive.”
Moussa explained: “I will risk my relationship if my mother mediates. I don’t think she can strike a sincere balance. My mother has her own role in my relationship but I don’t think she’d give the best advice if it’s critical.”
Amy Morin, author of ‘13 things mentally strong people don’t do’, gave some distinction of men and women in leadership role.
Amy said “Men aren’t afraid to improvise. Men tend to be more confident when it comes to their performance. Even when unprepared, research shows men often believe they can ‘wing it.’”
While for women she said “Women are more persuasive. Women tend to be able to read situations well and take in lots of information, which helps them to be more persuasive. Studies show they’re often able to understand the other side of a position and they’re able to use that to their advantage.”
Therefore whoever you choose, understanding their distinctive peculiarities and the nature of your relationship with them will help you understand why they proffered such advice to you.
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