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How I grew from being a naughty girl to a disciplined woman

 Hajiya Lami Tumaka, the Director, Special Duties, in the Director General’s office at the Nigerian Maritime Administration and Safety Agency (NIMASA) is a multiple awarding-winning public relations practitioner with experience spanning over two decades. She is the immediate past spokesperson of the agency. 

In April 2016,  EvanCarmichael.com, a popular website founded by Evan Carmichael, a Toronto-based entrepreneur and international speaker, named Hajiya Lami among the top 100 global public relations practitioners in the world. The beautiful lady from Niger State, also known for her fashionable dress sense, has won many other awards from many bodies in the country.  

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A Fellow of the Nigerian Institute of Public Relations (FNIPR), Hajiya Lami holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in English Literature and a Masters in Business Administration, both from the Ahmadu Bello University (ABU) Zaria. She also has a certificate in Basic Film Production from the TV College, Jos with distinction and a Diploma in Public Relations from the prestigious Holborn College, London.

 In this interview with Tambari, Lami daughter of a police officer and wife of an army general shares her experience growing up, motherhood, career, tastes and dislikes.

Growing up 
I am the second child of my parents. I have an elder brother, Justice Garba Tumaka and four girls behind me – Amina, Habiba, Jummai and Hauwa. As the first girl, I am like the mother of the family, while my elder brother is like the father. Being the first daughter put a lot of responsibility on me. We lost our father, a police officer, when I was just 12 years old and my mum took over all responsibilities of the family. That loss of our father made us assume responsibilities earlier than we ordinarily would.
 
Educational background 
I attended St. George’s Primary School at Falomo, which I believe is partly responsible for my cosmopolitan outlook. School was interesting. Then, we were living at Ikoyi, Lagos.
Thereafter, I was supposed to proceed to Holy Child College in Lagos. My brother, Garba, had gained admission to St. Gregory’s College. He was and still is a gentleman to the core, while my younger sisters and I were the naughty ones. My father did not want me to attend Holy Child. He felt I should be taken back home to become calmer. I was in Standard 1 when my dad took me back to Minna, Niger State, to continue my education.
 When we went for the admission interview, coincidentally, there were two schools conducting the exercise that day at the same place. One was Fatima Secondary School and the other, the primary school I was supposed to attend. Somehow, we joined the queue for the secondary rather than the primary school. It was a Catholic school.I did the interview for secondary school students mistakenly but I passed. I was just 11 years old. 
 It was after the interview that they found out I was not supposed to be there. My dad wanted to take me back to the primary school queue, but the reverend sisters insisted otherwise, saying I did well in the interview and should be given an opportunity to be in the secondary school. They said if after the first term I did not meet up, then I would be taken back to the primary school. Having heard that, I had to do well to avoid being sent back. It was quite a remarkable experience for me.
 I studied English at Ahmadu Bello University, with a bias for Literature. Upon graduation, I did my Youth Service at CABS, Kaduna Polytechnic where I taught communications skills. 
 
Aspirations while growing up 
Like every other child, I dreamt of one profession or the other, but mostly to be a lawyer. I don’t think I ever dreamt of being in the public relations profession where I am today. However,my inquisitive mind and empathy must have been some of the character traits that probably prepared me for who, what and where I am today.
 
Professional Career 
After I served at Kaduna Polytechnic, I taught at the Army Day Secondary School in Jaji, Kaduna State, where my husband was an instructor. I was there for some years, then I proceeded to the Nigerian Television Authority (NTA), Minna, where I rose to become a News Editor and presenter of a programme, ‘Events of the Week’. 
 From there, I joined Peugeot Automobile Nigeria Limited, Kaduna, as the Public Relations Manager. In 1998, I joined the Nigerian Maritime Authority (NMA) now NIMASA. I have been there ever since and through hardwork and God’s grace, I rose to the position of a director. 
 
Fond childhood memories 
They are many. One was particularly quite funny. There was an occasion my father visited my secondary school, when I was in Form 2. He came to ask the reverend sisters how I was doing at school. They told him that though I worked very hard, I was naughty. That disclosure made my father to give me a knock on my head and I cried and screamed so loudly and ran to the gate. It was a mixed school-boys and girls – and they all came out to check what was happening. 
 What was quite instructive was that after that incident, we vacated for the Christmas holidays and it was during that holiday that my dad died. When I came back, the news was all over that my father had died. Everybody knew him from that singular act of my screaming at the school.
 
Challenges
Life is full of challenges but who ever said life will be easy? Man was created to face the challenges of life. Working in NIMASA has been challenging, but extremely rewarding. It is a very technical organisation that has mainly men at the top. We the women have, however broken the glass ceiling because we have had a female director general in the past and that has given us a sense of belonging, that we could rise to the apex of our career. I was a deputy-director for 13 years before I was promoted to a director. I don’t think there is any challenge greater than being stagnated in one position for that long, but to the glory of God, that jinx has been broken.
 
Relationship with my husband
My husband, Major-General Abubakar Dada, former GOC 3rd Amoured Division, Jos  and I were destined to be together. I was a student in my third year at ABU and it was my birthday. I am a birthday freak. A male friend had gone with me to Kaduna to do some shopping for my special day. He asked that we visit his elder brother’s house on our way, and when we got there, we met a young, very handsome, dashing military officer to whom I was introduced as the daughter of so and so, from his state and we both spoke the same language. He was a bachelor who had risen to the position of a major in the Nigerian Army. We got talking, there was a spark and, as they say, the rest is history. By my youth service year, we were married.
 
Most cherished attributes of him
In the Nigerian Army, people knew General Dada as a most disciplined officer. He was a disciplined man who demanded discipline from me, while spoiling me rotten. He was very hardworking, strict, humble and liked to have the not-so-affluent as his friends. He was a good husband and a good father. He was a fantastic human being; sadly he died several years ago. The discipline he instilled in me also shaped my character.
 
Combining work and home front 
I started real work after my husband died, he did not want me to work. But it took me time to realize that he never wanted me to work. Whenever I was going for interviews, he apparently would have called where I was to be interviewed, telling them not to employ me without me knowing, of course. He would make arrangements for me to attend the interview, the driver would take me there, and sometimes we would go together, but I never got those jobs. The job he wanted for me was to teach at the Army Day Secondary School in Jaji. 
 
Was he the jealous type? 
He was very loving and, well, possessive. Naturally, this put us at odds on occasions.
 
Saddest moments
One was losing my mother at a time I least expected. Another was the death of my bosom friend May Ellen Ezekiel popularly called MEE, following a fibroid surgery. She was married to Richard Mofe Damijo (RMD).
 
Closest friends 
Due to my upbringing and environment, I am a totally detribalised Nigerian. I had very close friends from both the North and the South while growing up. In fact some of my very best friends have not only been northerners, but southerners as well. 
 
Your ideal man
I am naturally drawn to intellectually well-endowed men who are equally kind and supportive.
 
Fashion sense
I will not describe myself as a fashionable person because when I turned 50 some years ago, I liberated myself from the fashion dos and don’ts. All I do is wear what makes me comfortable. If it happens to be what is in vogue at that time, so be it. I have not allowed myself to be straitjacketed by fashion. 
 
Fashion items I can’t do without
Perfumes. I collect exotic perfumes as a hobby. I love perfumes but I don’t have any favorite, particular brand. I love the beautiful aroma of oud perfumes.  
 
Favourite fashion designer
Schon Afrique owned by my friend and former school mate, Mrs. Folake Majin in Lagos. I hardly wear foreign clothes now. I used to, when I was much younger but now, I am more traditional. I wear kaftans and skirt suits a lot. In my line of work, I bring out the Africaness in me. I use a lot of made-in-Nigeria fabrics to encourage our local manufacturers.
 
Accessories I can’t do without 
Earrings and eye pencil, without them I look ill. Usually, my clothes are well embellished, so I feel wearing a necklace would be an overkill.  
 
What I won’t be caught wearing 
You can’t catch me dead in a mini outfit at this point in my life. As a student in the university, I did wear them and shorts a lot, but not anymore. However, I still wear jeans.
 
What tickles me best in life
Definitely my family, friends, and my grandchildren! They are the best things that have happened to me. In that mix, my grandchildren are the icing on the cake. There is this joke about the Fulani man that says he enjoyed his grandchildren so much, that he said, if he knew they were so sweet, he would have had them (grand-children) before his children. That is how happy they make you. They are my greatest achievement in life, alhamdulillah. 
Having said that, here I must mention and thank, my beautiful, highly entrepreneurial daughter and her equally handsome husband, Mrs Halima Dada Ahmed, wife of Shahid Mansur Ahmed for giving me those cute and blessed little ones, Nussy, Husna and Farha. I’m eternally grateful to the Almighty for the gift of them. 
 
How I relax
I relax watching movies,including ‘Africa Magic’ movies at home, (laughs), also go to the cinemas. I go to the beach with my grandchildren.
 
Favourite books 
Autobiographies. I read them a lot. I am currently reading ‘I know Why the Caged Bird Sings’ by Maya Angelou. 
 
Likes and dislikes
I do not like hypocrites and fake people. For me, I wear my heart on my face. I don’t know how to pretend. The worst set of human beings are the hypocrites, people who pretend to be your friends but stab you in the back. 
 
Favourite music
I love Nigerian music, most especially music by Kiss Daniel. My favourite is his song ‘Mama’. It always reminds me of my mother.
 
Favourite colours 
White, gold, black. The deep, bold colours are my favourites. 
 
Favourite food and drink
Fresh okro with tuwon shinkafa, fresh crunchy vegetables, fruits and smoothies. They keep you looking younger, healthier, and help with the bowel movement.
 
Favourite travel destination
London. I know all the nooks and crannies of London. I also love Dubai and my village. 
 
Mother’s influence 
Monumental. My mother was a good woman, a fantastic human being. It brings tears to my eyes talking about her. She was a phenomenon. People speak about the Tumaka family as one solid, closely knit family, all thanks to my late mother. Our relationship with our mother has also positively impacted other people’s relationships with their mothers. After the death of my father, my mother educated my siblings and I, the six of us are all graduates and doing great. She died at a time we were all grown and had the capacity to care for her. 
 
Mother’s advice that stuck 
Be humble. I have tried to live by that. 
 
Lessons life has taught you
Be deeply introspective and empathic. Always put yourself in the position of the other person; respect and value all those who cross your path. Build relationships, you never know when you will need one another. Do not look down on anybody. 
 
 
First App I check in the morning and before going to bed
I am a phone freak. I check my WhatsApp, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and my mails regularly. With a DG like Dr. Dakuku Peterside, you have to be up and doing.  Our boss can send anyone an email anytime, and the ability to respond quickly shows you are on top of your game. 
 
Role models
My mum and my aunt, Mrs Rakiya Shinkafi.
 
Advice for women and younger generation 
Try to shatter the ceiling; do not allow anyone tell you that you can’t. Nothing is impossible, everything is possible and achievable. The sky is not your limit; it is actually the breakthrough to leap over. Set your goals and work towards achieving them.  No pain, no gain. Whatever you do in life, put God first. Never take your God, family and friends for granted because they are your backbone, and they keep you grounded. 
 
Plan to become a politician in future 
If my people want me to represent them, why not? I am almost at the end of my career as a civil servant. The next phase of my life might just be starting, by the special grace of God.
 
Most rewarding part of your career 
Becoming a director at NIMASA. 
 
Legacy 
I would want the name Lami Tumaka to be known for integrity and positivity. I would also like to be remembered as someone who did her best to make a difference in every endeavour that came her way.

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